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[Remadje]

I told my friends and family. I'm not ashamed! My mom was a little apprehensive about it saying she wished I would just do the new Curves weight management system (she owns a curves in smalltown Panora, IA) but I had tried so many things over the years and nothing worked. With the RNY that I had its easier for me to say no to eating something bad for me because I know it will make bad things happen IN me...LOL     Nope, I don't think I really care for a piece of birthday cake, but thanks anyway.    My 5 yr old,however, told everyone. My mom is having stomach surgery so she can get skinny. It is sooooo awesome that I can get out and do things with him now. I feel like a better mother now. 

Now, with the GREAT results I have had so far everyone just can't believe how good I am looking (I still have a long ways to go but, HEY!, I'm better than I was).

My son, who is now 6, will even make comments on what I eat and drink......."mom!, does that have sugar in it??"  Too cute. And annoying sometimes. haha

I have noticed too that men hold doors open for me more and speak to me more since my surgery. Before, I could be standing right behind them trying to get in the door and they would just let it shut in my face. 

[mystimel]

I don't even know if I will be approved for the surgery yet. I know I need my gallbladder out sometime soon and I want to try to schedule the surgery sometime this summer and have wls done at the same time. Regardless, I've already told my boyfriend and much of my family that I'm interested in it. It's a little easier for me to tell people because my mother is 10 or so months post-RNY and doing great.
I'm not so sure about telling people who don't know my mother well though. I know how the idea is a bit scary for some. I was one of the scared ones when I found out my mom was going to do it (she never told me until her date was scheduled. I was worried about the abdominal surgery and also was doing pretty well on weight watchers at the time. I was a little of the feeling that she should try weight watchers because she hadn't before and I really liked it. I thought it was the last diet I'd ever have to do.
As a former skeptic, this is how I will attempt to explain my decision to get the surgery to those who have never met someone who had it done.
10 months after joining weight watchers (definitely not the first diet i've tried, but the one that made me most hopeful.) I've only lost about 20 pounds. It was nearly 30 lost at one point but I regained some recently as it's become extremely difficult for me to keep on track. At the time mom had her surgery I only barely considered it to be a solution for me. I was under the impression that if I could just diet long enough to lose all my weight I could keep it off and be skinny forever. I've recently realized that goal isn't very realistic for me at all and that surgery is difficult but it has so many rewards that if you can accept the risks it is worth the cost tenfold.
I reconsidered surgery because I was told I needed laproscopic surgery anyhow to remove my gallbladder, and I looked at my mom with her scars and asked myself. Why can't I be happy like her? I would have the same scars and similar pain by just removing my gallbladder and I would only barely be better off for it. I began to see that I would probably end up like she did someday, left without any more realistic options and I would waste a lot of time dieting and regaining over and over again, feeling miserable and guilty all the time while denying my problem. I don't want that for myself. I want to start my healthy life as soon as possible.
Who can argue with that really?
I suppose that there might still be people I don't tell for certain reasons. It's just not a discussion you want to have with everyone. I will probably tell my obese friends so they can watch me and see if it might be right for them, but maybe not if I know they have no insurance. It would just frustrate them, especially if they are currently dieting. I'm fairly young (22) to be giving up on diets so it might be discouraging for those who don't have surgery as an option.

[McNee]

I'm fairly young (22) to be giving up on diets so it might be discouraging for those who don't have surgery as an option.

A part of me is already wishing I had done this 10 years ago (41 now).

I was... lucky? Even at 350# I was still pretty active... paintball, camping, hiking, etc. Maybe not always as much as I wanted... but it wasn't terrible. It was the last 20-30 pounds that did me in... and it was my lack of ability to be even slightly active that got me to the point last year I decided to do this.

I'm trying not to dwell on it, but I know there are going to be times where I look back and won't help but wonder "what if?" What if I had done this 10 or so years ago? How much "life" did I miss out on this last decade because of my weight? How much have I spent on medical bills for my blood pressure and such related to my weight?

So don't focus on how young you are... focus on how much better things will be after... you'll never know what you might have missed if you didn't take the steps you're taking now. The best is yet to come, and you'll have a LOT of time to revel in it.

[kristopia]

myst - welcome - and glad you have a "predecessor" - funny, I lost 30 lbs on WW as well - and have gained every pound back but one.  OY.

I've decided that my friends and coworkers here in NC (not acquaintances, but friends) will know, and I've talked to most of them about it - it makes it easier that two of my close coworkers have had WLS (one RNY, and looks FABULOUS after 2 years, and one VSG who has lost 125 lbs and has about 140 to go). 

However, I am not telling family until afterward, when I show results.  I know my father will be a pain - he already has - he thinks he's the authority now that he's lost a lot with Nutrasystem.  This has happened before with him and other diets - I hope a LOT that he is able to keep it off this time - but I'm not willing to be 65 as he is, and still starving myself into weight loss.

[Kierie]

I told 2 of my three good friends and they pretended not to know b/c my third friend's mom was a Dietician and Couldn't wrap her brain around that I couldn't just do it with food (oh and eating rice and bread) After I had the surgery or maybe the night before I sent out an email saying what I was doing
At work I told my friends but no one else

DH told the whole damn world. . .He was nervous! but now everyone knows and mostly are just curious
Kierie

[Hassett]

Nope.....ain't tellin.  I told my mom, of course, my partner and kids.  Then End.

Most see me eating differently and I say I am going to lose about 50 lbs and I am working really hard to do it.  They see me exercising....and making good food choices.

Some admire my will power, and even though I know I am decieving them, it hardly matters to me.  This would be my choice, my body, my decision, my secret.

I know my answer would not be kind to anyone that said I took the easy way out.  LOL  I may educate or annihilate.  Depending on the day.

Like my brother says....NUNNYA.........for none of ya business!!

Cept all of you ................of course

[KellyRNCCRN]

I told most people....some people I didn't tell, like my friend from high school.  She'll be in for a REAL surprise next time I see her.  I'm pretty open with things in my life.  I also didn't tell a few relatives as they have always been less than supportive.

[HopenToBeThin]

Yep, tellin everybody.  Asking for prayers.  Figure the more that know, the more I will be held accountable.  May backfire, but OK for now.

[nature girl]

Yes I told people.  I didn't want anyone to think that I was sick when I started losing weight.



Amy

[frances_n]

Like T2Nashville, I told everyone, even strangers (when/if the conversation was appropriate).

I have in the past, and I will continue to let my "freak flag fly"!

[Lady K.]

In an Upcoming episode, I want to discuss telling people about that fact that you were going to have surgery or have had surgery.

Did you tell people?
Who did you tell
Did you purposely not tell people?
Is it still a secret?
If you a long term, do you still tell people?

Well I know this reply is late - saw the episode - LOL!

Did I tell people? - You betcha!!  Even the checker at the grocery store 
Who did I tell? - See above answer
Did I purposely not tell people? - yeah a couple - just because even though I have to deal with them, I really don't like them much 
Is it a secret? - No, if they ask I will tell. 

I'm excited about this tool that my surgeon gave me  and I will share that with the world! Even those I don't really like much if they ask and express an interest.

[missmarymac]

I'm late to this...but just catching up on episodes.

The first person I told was my Dad. He's a doctor and has lots of opinions   When he immediately said how many advances have been made, and how high the rate of diabetes reversal is... and how proud he was of me.. I was all in.
After that, I told everyone...   All my family, friends, co-workers.   

Like someone else mentioned, I started a blog and even if no one ever looks at it -- it helps ME stay motivated.  My dogs aren't very good at that other than whining at the door to go for a walk

[wtgrlady]

Welcome MissMaryMac.  Love the name! 

[Atomx]

Yup. I told anyone and everyone that asked.  I don't wear a sandwhich board that advertises it; but if they ask, I tell.  I have no shame in being a surgically altered freak!!  If people judge me, which they have, that is their own insecurity shining through and they should work that out themselves; meanwhile, I just workout!!

[Sara]

Welll, I guess I have told the whole world, I vlog about my journey on youtube, so yeah the whole world. I thought about it and at first i didnt want to share and now I am more open to it.

[Sonya]

I told my family.  I kinda wanted to keep it quiet, but here in the Army nothing is your own.   I told by BFF Sarah cause we we asked her to keep our boys while I am having my surgery.    I want to post it on my facebook but I will wait until I have pics to share.  I did also told the cashier at the shoppette because she was like have u lost weight lol.  I did but only in my face. lol

[MelissaAletha]

I feel really lucky to have such an awesome support system.

I've told EVERYONE!  I was way to excited about having RNY that I couldnt not tell people.  Everyone in my family knows.  Everyone at my work knows.  And today was my first day back to work and I never felt better.  So many people gave me compliments on how well I'm doing and how different I look.  I havent seen or felt the changes yet so it was nice to know that people are seeing it.

I'm so glad that I havent had to deal with any negative comments. 

We did have a woman at my work die last year due to complications so a few people were concerned and talked to me to make sure I would be ok.  Other than that I've had all positive attitude and responses to having this surgery done.

I'm so thankful for that!

Now if only I can get some of my family to quit asking me if its ok for me to eat certain things or to chew well.  LOL  I know they mean well but its still annoying LOL

[aonesister]

Did you tell people?
Who did you tell
Did you purposely not tell people?
Is it still a secret?
If you a long term, do you still tell people?

I told everyone. I tell everyone. I have always been an open book. I believe that we have enough misconceptions in this world without adding to it by not being straight-up.

[Big Mickey]

I believe that we have enough misconceptions in this world without adding to it by not being straight-up.

Man I wish more folks would follow that rule! It would make life a lot easier.

Mike

[rox0303]

I have told everyone..  First I just discussed it with my husband and kids...  but when I decied that this was what i was going to do I told my sister and a friend....  them I got everything approved though work and then told my mom and mom in law....  once I told then, I anounced it to the world...  LOL...  I sent a message to some of my closer friends and family on facebook and included some website that they could look at to see what I was doing...  I sooo need all the support that I can get!! 

[Hungry2live]

Well, this is an old thread... but what the heck.

Yes, I told people if they were interested.

I told my family and friends.  If anyone wants to know about it, or why I eat the way I do, I will be more than happy to discuss it with them.

Nope, I didn't purposely not tell anyone.

Nope, It wasn't a secret from the day I went to my first seminar.

[kiersti]

Wow..I didn't realize what a minority I am in.  I haven't really told anyone.  My husband knows and my immediate family.  All my in-laws, can't keep a nugget like this tapped down.  My boss and the guy who works for me.  But that's about it.  I don't really feel comfortable telling people.  It's personal for me.

Not sure why I feel that way.  I don't feel ashamed but when the few people who have commented on my weight loss ask how I have done it I just smile and say that "I am eating less and moving more!" 

[moosedrul]

I talked to my doctor about it first and she was 100% behind me going ahead and said and is still saying, she will do whatever it takes to get me through this.  I had thought about the lap band last year and had talked about it with my wife, but was not as fired up about is as I should have been.  What pulled the trigger for me was a friend of ours at our winter home in southern california who took me aside and was very concerned about my weight.  It really hit me hard (in a good way) and as soon as we got home, the end of april, I told my wife that's it, I'm going ahead with WLS.  She was a little surprise because I had not said anything about it sense last year.  I wanted to keep it under wraps for a while.  Anyway, I didn't have to say anything as my wife put me on the prayer chain at church and from there it might as well been on the local radio (small town you know).  It's fine that everyone knows, I'm just the kind of person who doesn't talk much about those personal things to everyone. 

My BTV family however, is great support and what it has told me is that it really doesn't make much differance the bottomline to all of this is gain your health back.  However there are those out there who feel if you have excess skin after you loose your weight, you have had problems, "ooooooh nooooooo camel breath......." 

[FuzzyPeach]

Am due to have a bypass on 29 October, have told my Line Manager at work, who is going to tell everyone its a 'womans' thing when I am off for two weeks, told my best friend she is worried but supportive.  My mum and mother in law are both worried, most people think it is a bit drastic and I should just stop eating and exercise more.  If it was that easy dont they think I would have done that by now!  One woman at work who knows has started commenting on what I eat, like she is the food police!   Don't think I will tell anyone else, I feel a little embarrased that my weight has got so bad that I have to have surgery.  My husband has been wonderful, just wants me to be happy and healthy and will support me all the way.  I might feel different after the op and want to tell the whole world - will just have to wait and see!!

[ttowe]

Welcome aboard FuzzyPeach.

Your story is very familiar to mine.

I think everyone of us has gotten the "Bit drastic" line. :-)

Good luck.

Toni